Culture shock - a worst start possible

Moving to a foreign country was one of my long-held dreams. I loved the English language and English culture. In 2000 I visited one of my friends in London. After returning home, I set my mind on moving there. The easiest way to find a job was to work as an au-pair/nanny (Hungary wasn't part of the EU yet). However, I was over the age limit accepted at that time. The agent seeing my determination suggested Spain as an alternative and only solution. I was devastated, who wants to go to Spain instead of England, it sounded crazy. A friend convinced me that I will lose nothing by trying it. But, I knew nothing about Spain besides the stereotypes, plus I didn't like the language. In my head, Spain was a place just like this postcard.

To cut it short, I wasn't prepared at all before I moved to Spain. I could only say hello and goodbye in Spanish, that was all my language knowledge when I arrived in Barcelona. My first job was in a small city near Barcelona. Although my host family spoke good English, I couldn't find anyone else in that city who was willing to communicate in English. It made getting around a challenge. At that time, there were no smartphones with GPS. So, help from the locals was essential. But, they were an unfriendly bunch. Later, I found out that the city is known for its unfriendliness if you want to use other languages than Catalan (it must have changed since).

Besides my lack of Spanish, I know very little about life in Catalunya and in Spain. Shops closing at midday, having supper at late hours, going to bed after midnight, always being late, yes doesn't mean they will do it now and there ('tomorrow' attitude). Just to mention some of the cultural differences that made me feel uncomfortable, nervous, annoyed and agitated. Meanwhile, I continuously compared the culture I came from with theirs, the way of dealing with problems and life in general. This made adjusting to my new environment extremely slow.

Their customs and habits were strange to me, and mine was annoying to them. I felt I was forced to accept their way of living and thinking. After 3 months, our parts departed with my employer. This negative experience made me think of going home. But, inside I knew, going home and giving up would undermine all my efforts. I didn't wanna be one of those who goes home and talks about his/her bitter experience abroad.

It took nearly 6 months to turn the table around (improve the situation). I started to accept the Spanish way of life. Though it was a long process, Spanish culture taught me to enjoy life. Also, I came to love the language too. There, I also learnt one of the most valuable lessons of my life, namely: to not compare cultures and countries with each other, but see them with an impartial eye.

My friend was right, I lost nothing, but gained new friends, a beautiful language and a second home in those 3 years while I lived there.

image: https://www.amazon.co.uk/islandburner-Canvas-Skyline-Barcelona-Picture/dp/B07262DFTM


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